The end is not near
The other day I found myself in one of my regular panics about time leaking away at a rapid rate. How I had so so much to do in such a short period of time that I just wanted September to end already. A crazy thought, it's only September 3rd. But I tend to freak out like this every once in a while for about an hour, thinking things are seemingly unsustainable and this life is a mistake.
I've felt this anxiety a lot over this last month with a lot of my moving woes and helping the people close to me with their moves or issues as well. It's a strange thing in my head that I want to change: catastrophizing. I don't think I've ever once been in a situation where it has actually helped me. Imagining the worst case scenario is unnecessary baggage to an already stressed mind. I believe it comes from a well-intentioned foundation of considering all outcomes. Really, it just paralyzes me, stopping me from even doing what I should.
Today, I can look at an even busier schedule for the next week and not feel a sweat about it. Whereas 24-hours ago I was getting lost in my rug's details running the same treadmill in my mind about it - over and over and over again. Not good. A phone call from my girlfriend managed to pull me out of this unnecessary rumination and flipped my day positive again <3
But it should not be on others to fish me out of this state. It is not something that can be fixed in one day or one blog post, but consider this the first landmark for developing change. It's never too late for anyone.
-bzg
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